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Lucia Lloyd’s sermon: Before I formed you in the womb I knew you
​Aug 25, 2019
Proper 21, Year C
Jeremiah 1:4-10​

“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you.” God tells Jeremiah in today’s Old Testament passage that God knew him even before God formed him in the womb, even before he was conceived, before he existed in material form at all, God knew him.  God knows us not only after our earthly lives have ended; God also knows us before our earthly lives have begun.  It is because of this knowledge that God can see things in us that we have not quite been able to see in ourselves yet.

What happens in this call narrative is what happens in every other call narrative in scripture.  Almighty God, Creator of the universe, announces that the person has a particular calling and the person says, “No. I am inadequate.” 
God tells Jeremiah, “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you,
and before you were born I consecrated you;
I appointed you a prophet to the nations."
Then I said, "Ah, Lord GOD! Truly I do not know how to speak, for I am only a boy."
 
We see this pattern over and over in these call narratives: Moses comes to mind, and Jonah.  And that’s the difference between our view of ourselves and God’s view of us.  Our view of ourselves is clouded with self-doubt and feelings of inadequacy, but God’s view of us is not.  Although God knows our sins and weaknesses, God also knows with infinite clarity what we are capable of.  Even more important, God knows what God is capable of.  We are not left only to our own resources, we have the Creator of the universe at work in us.  Jeremiah’s view of himself is clouded by his feelings of inadequacy, but God knows Jeremiah fully, and always has. 
 
But the LORD said to me,
"Do not say, 'I am only a boy';
for you shall go to all to whom I send you,
and you shall speak whatever I command you,
Do not be afraid of them,
for I am with you to deliver you,
says the LORD."
 
That phrase “Do not be afraid” is what God says to us humans over and over and over again.  The opposite of fear is faith.

I’ve been talking to a friend who is in the discernment process and is moving along in his journey toward becoming a priest.  He often reminds me of myself when I was at that stage of the process, and how terrified I was.  I remember how important it was to me to have people who could see the priest in me before I was able to see it myself, and to see God at work in me in ways that I was able to recognize only in hindsight.  What clouded my vision most was my fear and my feelings of inadequacy.

These issues don’t just pop up around topics of ordination; they are part of our everyday lives.  Even something as ordinary as procrastination is usually caused by feelings of fear or inadequacy.  Part of procrastination may be the unpleasantness of the task itself, like cleaning icky stuff out of the fridge, but there is usually another element in the mix, which is that the task brings up our feelings of inadequacy that we’ve been doing a lousy job all along and we shouldn’t have let things get this bad.  Each individual has our feelings of inadequacy in different spots.  For some, it’s a sense of inadequacy that our finances are in terrible shape; for others it’s a sense of inadequacy about clutter and disorganization; for others we feel inadequate as parents or spouses.  For writers, the feelings of inadequacy and fear are the root of writer’s block, for speakers those feelings are at the root of stage fright.  We’ve all got them, no matter who we are.

There are some wonderful stories out there about God changing the direction of someone’s life, stories of transformation.  I do believe that’s one of the ways God works in our lives, and I thank God for those transformations.  Still, changing the direction of our lives is not the only way God works.  More often, God works by getting rid of all the burdens and baggage that weigh us down and exhaust us while we’re trudging along our path, so that we can get moving in the direction God has meant for us all along.  The heaviest burden is usually fear about the future, and the heaviest baggage is usually feelings of inadequacy we’re still carrying around from the past.  God can see that this is just worthless junk we’ve got strapped to our shoulders, and it isn’t us at all.  God says drop it and go.  You’ve got a calling.

Do not say, 'I am only a boy';
for you shall go to all to whom I send you,
and you shall speak whatever I command you,
Do not be afraid of them,
for I am with you to deliver you,
says the LORD."
 
Like Jeremiah, when our feelings of inadequacy kick in, they can make us feel like little kids.  But God tells us not to regress; it’s time to move forward.  God tells us not to be afraid, because God is with us.  God has known us long enough to know what calling to give us, even if we don’t know yet that we are able to fulfill it. 

One of the things wonderful things about being part of a community of faith here at St. John’s is that you offer encouragement to each other, and you express confidence in each other.  I think that is partly because you can see in each other some of what God sees.  You know in each other some of what God knows.  You can see right through the other person’s self-doubt to see what’s really there in the other person, all the wonderful gifts they have to offer.  And we can see some of what God sees in you, all the wonderful gifts you have to offer. 

​God knows what’s in you.  We know what’s in you.  Today is an opportunity for you to know what’s in you, and to not be afraid as you fulfill God’s calling for you.
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